Sorting Out the Pieces
2016 came and in the turn of an eye, one third of the year has gone by. Perhaps it comes with age. The older you are, the faster time seems to pass.
Compared to last year, I would say I feel like a totally different person after being inundated with Japan’s sub-culture, spending much of my spare time either watching anime, reading manga, playing JRPG games or hunting for related figurines.
With the addition of new supervisors to help spread the workload, I’ve found slightly more time on hand to get the children enrolled in some extracurricular activities according to their passion. Joel in manga art, Elizabeth in piano and Benjamin in Lego robotics.
I have to say that accompanying Elizabeth on her piano lessons and practicing with her has somehow arose in me a long forgotten interest in the instrument. I admit shamefully that my interest in the piano started again after watching Nodame Cantabile. Of course, I don’t have her talent but listening to these pianist play the classical pieces is simply awe inspiring, such that I had no qualms to sink $3,600 into getting a second hand Yamaha piano from Japan.
At work, I was somehow promoted again, shortly two years since my last promotion. Honestly I don’t feel the difference. I’ve practically been involved in the set up, strategizing and implementation of various programmes and campaigns that it almost feels like the blood that runs in my veins already. Not that my passion has waned, in fact, with the number of new initiatives upcoming, I am on the contrary worried that my decision to leave work in 2017 may not materialise.
Recently I attended a conference on community engagement. I had no expectations on what to bring home with me but one of the speakers ignited something in me. It was the first time I looked at another potential profession with interest. I came from sales, then accounting, then communications. I had no idea where I was to go next. But this speaker shared with us his job scope in corporate social responsibility that made such a great impact in the community that I felt inspired to make this my next career.
Perhaps it is God’s way of preparing and leading me onwards. Perhaps He thinks it is timely for me to step up. It’s amazing looking at how much I’ve grown over these last 6 years in the same job. I came in totally clueless and ostracised but today, I find it strange to be so warmly welcomed and heeded like I have much to contribute (when sometimes I think I’m just spouting nonsense). I’ve some gained the trust of my officers and have formed close friendships with some of them, something I never dreamt I would be able to achieve.
Outside of work and personal interest, what I’ve been struggling most with is to get Joel up to speed with his school work. It is worrying for me that as his PSLE approaches, he doesn’t seem to have the motivation at all to want to excel and his results are really just barely scrapping the passing mark. On one hand, I feel like his future is not determined by academics or his PSLE score alone, on the other hand, I feel like beyond studies, his attitude towards life really sucks.
All my children seem to suffer from the ills of being brought up in a first world country where they don’t have to worry about anything other than what show to watch on the iPad. I’m grateful that God has blessed our family so much when we started with so little and in a dreary state, but I’m also cognizant that in order to bring up a strong next generation, I cannot afford for them to become strawberries.
How can I bring about that kind of realisation? My colleague suggested sending them for motivation courses but I don’t believe in those because true motivation needs to come from God. I guess I’ll just have to keep watching and praying for divine intervention.